well, something was definitely happening. we had a baby that night!
the facts:
i asked debbie to check me around 530pm and i was dilated to 3cm, and by about 630pm i was having contractions enough to make me pause and breathe while i made dinner. we ate, and by 730 i was in bed coping and trying to rest. i'm not sure how long i was there before i felt like i had better get in the tub, but labor was for real so i called debbie and we agreed she'd give it a little while and then leave (she lives over an hour away!)... and i got in the bath and never got back out again. matt called karen and my mom at some point, too, such that they all arrived at exactly the same time (i'm told it was 9:40pm).
by the time karen popped her head in the bathroom i was in or past transition and had had several "pushy" contractions. there was a definite period where i was falling asleep between them so i assume they spaced out and gave me a rest the way books always say it happens during transition. debbie came in to set up and then went back out for a little bit, and i'm not sure when but shortly after that i told karen to get matt because i was feeling the baby's head in my birth canal! i wasn't sure how fast it would all go, but i knew he needed to be there asap... after a few more pushy contractions i told them to let my mom in too, and then all of a sudden he was crowning. it felt like it took forever for that to end... it was intense... but as soon as his head was out the rest of him came on the next push. straight into the bath and up into my arms and it was over. he was born at 1042pm on september 29. 7lb 12oz.
my reflections:
first, debbie was the best midwife ever. i needed no help and she offered none save once; i was struggling to birth his head as slowly as i could--"pushing" is more like holding on for dear life--and she said "take control of it" and that was the only advice or intervention she gave me the entire time she was present. no blood pressure checks, no heart tone checks, no temperatures... she let me give birth without making herself important or necessary for any reason whatsoever. it was amazing.
as for the birth, i got exactly what i was too afraid to dare i could have... despite the onlookers (which is all they were, though matt being there meant more of course) i had an unassisted birth. no one spoke, no one intervened, and i labored alone in the dark in my bathtub the entire time, which was surprisingly short. i think there was an oil lamp and a few candles lit, actually, but it was basically the dark. debbie told me later it was as peaceful of a birth as she has ever seen, and that made me really happy. from my perspective it was thrashing and shouting, but apparently i didn't actually do what i imagined i was doing. i birthed his head leaning over the side of the tub on my knees, and once it was out i sort of flopped backwards to birth the rest of him and take him out of the water. my poor mom, finally allowed into the birth room, missed the birth because of a phone call. she went out to get something for debbie, the phone rang, and when she came back he was out. i think she was pretty upset about it, but i did my best to give her a chance at least.
(my train of thought is a little off b/c i've been writing this for 3 days)
i know that labor technically went from about 330-1042 but for me it was really only the last two to three hours that were "labor" which is so shocking to me since rowan's was a full 17 hours of excruciating contractions from start to finish (thank you very much, castor oil). it wasn't until yesterday, when i really started to process this amazingly perfect birth experience, that i realized just how fucked-the-fuck-up rowan's birth really was. i felt like i had been hit by a truck, beaten with 2x4s between my legs, deflated in the belly, and totally psychotically miserable for weeks after she was born. weeks. after this birth i was tired but normal... like, really, normal. i woke up the next day and was barely sore. i couldn't kegel for months after rowan, and bladder control was a really tough issue--this time, it's like nothing even happened. i am normal. i tore slightly but it was superficial enough to let alone, and it doesn't even hurt; there are some spots that burn when i pee though, so i know there are a few little splits or "skid marks" hiding down there. i'm dwelling on all this because i'm honestly having a really hard time accepting that THIS is what birth does to you: not much! it's not the terrible, traumatic, difficult trial we have all been lead to believe... or at least, it doesn't have to be. i am so totally myself it's almost scary. in the best way, of course.
i'm going to end this here because i have been writing for DAYS and not published yet; time is precious and i haven't had a whole lot of it. despite this, life is surprisingly unstressful and extremely pleasant... i'm really, really happy. rowan is taking it like an angel, too... she loves the baby and has displayed absolutely no signs of jealousy whatsoever. the darling.
anyway, he's calling me. more when i have time, including photos.
the facts:
i asked debbie to check me around 530pm and i was dilated to 3cm, and by about 630pm i was having contractions enough to make me pause and breathe while i made dinner. we ate, and by 730 i was in bed coping and trying to rest. i'm not sure how long i was there before i felt like i had better get in the tub, but labor was for real so i called debbie and we agreed she'd give it a little while and then leave (she lives over an hour away!)... and i got in the bath and never got back out again. matt called karen and my mom at some point, too, such that they all arrived at exactly the same time (i'm told it was 9:40pm).
by the time karen popped her head in the bathroom i was in or past transition and had had several "pushy" contractions. there was a definite period where i was falling asleep between them so i assume they spaced out and gave me a rest the way books always say it happens during transition. debbie came in to set up and then went back out for a little bit, and i'm not sure when but shortly after that i told karen to get matt because i was feeling the baby's head in my birth canal! i wasn't sure how fast it would all go, but i knew he needed to be there asap... after a few more pushy contractions i told them to let my mom in too, and then all of a sudden he was crowning. it felt like it took forever for that to end... it was intense... but as soon as his head was out the rest of him came on the next push. straight into the bath and up into my arms and it was over. he was born at 1042pm on september 29. 7lb 12oz.
my reflections:
first, debbie was the best midwife ever. i needed no help and she offered none save once; i was struggling to birth his head as slowly as i could--"pushing" is more like holding on for dear life--and she said "take control of it" and that was the only advice or intervention she gave me the entire time she was present. no blood pressure checks, no heart tone checks, no temperatures... she let me give birth without making herself important or necessary for any reason whatsoever. it was amazing.
as for the birth, i got exactly what i was too afraid to dare i could have... despite the onlookers (which is all they were, though matt being there meant more of course) i had an unassisted birth. no one spoke, no one intervened, and i labored alone in the dark in my bathtub the entire time, which was surprisingly short. i think there was an oil lamp and a few candles lit, actually, but it was basically the dark. debbie told me later it was as peaceful of a birth as she has ever seen, and that made me really happy. from my perspective it was thrashing and shouting, but apparently i didn't actually do what i imagined i was doing. i birthed his head leaning over the side of the tub on my knees, and once it was out i sort of flopped backwards to birth the rest of him and take him out of the water. my poor mom, finally allowed into the birth room, missed the birth because of a phone call. she went out to get something for debbie, the phone rang, and when she came back he was out. i think she was pretty upset about it, but i did my best to give her a chance at least.
(my train of thought is a little off b/c i've been writing this for 3 days)
i know that labor technically went from about 330-1042 but for me it was really only the last two to three hours that were "labor" which is so shocking to me since rowan's was a full 17 hours of excruciating contractions from start to finish (thank you very much, castor oil). it wasn't until yesterday, when i really started to process this amazingly perfect birth experience, that i realized just how fucked-the-fuck-up rowan's birth really was. i felt like i had been hit by a truck, beaten with 2x4s between my legs, deflated in the belly, and totally psychotically miserable for weeks after she was born. weeks. after this birth i was tired but normal... like, really, normal. i woke up the next day and was barely sore. i couldn't kegel for months after rowan, and bladder control was a really tough issue--this time, it's like nothing even happened. i am normal. i tore slightly but it was superficial enough to let alone, and it doesn't even hurt; there are some spots that burn when i pee though, so i know there are a few little splits or "skid marks" hiding down there. i'm dwelling on all this because i'm honestly having a really hard time accepting that THIS is what birth does to you: not much! it's not the terrible, traumatic, difficult trial we have all been lead to believe... or at least, it doesn't have to be. i am so totally myself it's almost scary. in the best way, of course.
i'm going to end this here because i have been writing for DAYS and not published yet; time is precious and i haven't had a whole lot of it. despite this, life is surprisingly unstressful and extremely pleasant... i'm really, really happy. rowan is taking it like an angel, too... she loves the baby and has displayed absolutely no signs of jealousy whatsoever. the darling.
anyway, he's calling me. more when i have time, including photos.
Posts
October 5, 2010 at 6:58 PM
Whoops I guess I commented my congratulations on the wrong post. See post below for my original comment but I can congratulate you here again too.
Congratulations! :)