september mama

i haven't posted in a while because there was a half-written post i was sitting on--a whine/rant/freak-out about how everyone else was freaking out about the homebirth--that i have decided not to post after all. i'm over it and i don't want to talk about it. i have not wavered for a second over my decision and matt is supportive, and that's all that matters. everything else is speculation and possibility and that's where it should be left. we'll deal with what happens when it happens.

in the meantime, rowan has had her first shower and been to the beach. the shower surprised me because she loved it; i assumed the water spraying her head and face would be too much, but she played and yelled and had a great old time. very cute. the beach was a birthday party for two of her second cousins, and even with a 2.5 hour drive each way with a car full of my family (and infant nephew), and no nap, she was all smiles and silliness the whole day. she really really liked the sand and even the waves, amazingly. i guess her timidity is less than i have come to believe...

she also had a visit from "nana and pops" (matt's dad/wife) which was a lot of fun for her. they took us to blue springs and she squealed about all the kids diving from a platform into the frigid water. she learned to say "spider" thanks to pops. just what i need, little rowan pointing out every bloody spider she sees out here in the woods... *shudder* she's really working on her vocabulary lately and she is outgrowing shoes like it's nobody's business. size 5 as of two weeks ago and already getting tight! i can also clip her hair up into a little twisty-thing at the back, which is totally cute. matt says i need to cut her bangs but i'm not into the idea.

mr. nameless second baby is growing, too, and i am somewhat uncomfortable a lot of the time as a result. he's quite high and never changes position--just pokes his feet out my right side and punches down in my bladder--but the braxton-hicks are starting to suck now that he's nearly birthing size. there isn't much more room left for him. i look pretty weird though because i'm basically all belly and normal everywhere else. i had such a crappy time with rowan's pregnancy, but thankfully this time has been easy. the only thing that has really sucked the past few days is that i have been having some kind of reflux problem when i lay down... i'm never, ever hungry anymore because i think my stomach is completely compressed by his butt and feet (depending on the moment) and it would seem that my digestive system has basically stopped, because at 4pm today i was tasting breakfast. and when i lay down i feel nauseous and/or as if the contents of my stomach are pushing their way out-through-the-in-door. pretty gross and uncomfortable. but i still have no swelling, no arthritis, practically no leg cramps (i think i've had two actually present), no painful feet, and no general fatness. i'd even say the urinary... issues... of pregnancy are the same if not less than they were the first time; that surprises me. so if i dare to hope that the birth will reflect the 10-month journey, this might actually go pretty well.

i've got all my supplies on-hand (except a fish net, LOL)* and i was excited to be able to order three single bendable straws for $.05 each from the site where i got the stuff. so much nicer to say "hmm, i only need two adult diapers" rather than spending $15 on a package or buying a whole birth kit. i have so much stuff already that i only needed to order like $10 worth of supplies. they also sell fetoscopes and hemoglobin analyzers and things like that, for the unabirthers who want equipment.

so... my "window' commences on friday. yikes! but i guess until he drops i shouldn't be too worried. i still need to kick matt into fixing the cradle *growl* and probably clean 25 more times, but otherwise we're ready. i'd like to henna my hands and feet one of these days too. and pull some of the sandspurs out of the yard before they go to seed... and probably make a decision on what his name is going to be!! i think i have three finalists but two are untested and i'm really leaning towards #1. i guess i should post them, since i've been so secretive about the name thing thus far. possible names:
1) reid owen
2) lane matthew
3) cullen ?wood?
... not sure about the middle name on #3. i also like "flynn matthew" but flynn means red-faced and i don't want to curse him like that. and now matt just walked in and is talking with someone on the phone about names. time to pressure him :)

*if you don't know why a fish net is important for a home/water birth, you don't want to. if you do, you know why i am laughing. ah, bodily functions.